Standing Up Sometimes Means Standing Alone

     I have often heard the saying, it's lonely at the top. I can not confirm, nor deny said statement. The main reason is I'm not at the top of anything. I'm more like on par. And I'm good with that. I do however have a thought about being alone that I would like to share.
     Have you ever had something that you believe in? And I don't just mean, oh I believe in the Canucks, we will win the cup this year (yes honey, I am sure that they will win). I mean truly, unconditionally, with every fiber of your being, believe in? Something that you would defend and fight for until the end?
     Chances are if you have children, there's something. As unique and special as each child is, their needs and abilities are just as unique and varying. I have three children. I love all of them dearly and would give anything for them. I also know that they don't fit into the standard box. Two need modified IEPs at school to support them in their learning (although both are super smart, they just learn different) and one requires help with testing her blood sugar and giving insulin. So outside the box we stand. Again I'm good with it.
     The part that I have a problem with is, some kids need more. More support, more time, more resources. Now in a perfect world, an honest and forth coming world, all kids would get all the support they need, without judgement or hassle. However this is not the case.
     In most cases if you have a child that sits even a little outside the box, you have to be present and consistent and adiment sometimes in what they need. It's tiring, it's thankless and it's emotionally draining. But for me I think the hardest part is, people that don't understand. Or that haven't had to face dealing with a child that needs more.
     In my head and heart, I know what my kids need. I know what they need to be safe. I know what they need to excel. I know what I need to do to make all of this happen. Some of the time it's things that my friends or family can't understand. Some times it's things that a stranger likes to tell me that there just aren't resources for. Some times it's some thing that everyone likes to remember that there is no money in the budget for. On some rare occasions it's some thing that people would like to tell if that's the case that my child should be pulled from school and home schooled. To these people I say ignorance is bliss.
     There is nothing in the world worth fighting for, if I can not fight for what I believe my kids need and in some cases are entitled to. Some parts of the journey I stand alone. There is no one to walk beside me, as my child is unique and I am fighting for what they need. Some parts of the journey I am joined by friends and family looking for some of the same things that I am, better support at school, better policies in place and an understanding and embracing community to be part of.
     I believe with my every fiber that I am doing the best that I can for those that I love. Not everyone would agree with my approach or support me in my demands, but that's alright. I'm not sure if it's lonely at the top, if I ever get there I will let you know. But for now I can tell you that some times standing up for what you believe in means you stand alone. And that's alright.